Entangled Dreams: A Southern Romantic-Suspense Novel - Florida by Carmen DeSousa

Author:Carmen DeSousa [DeSousa, Carmen]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2014-08-11T16:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER TWENTY

Cameron collapsed back on the bed, sighing heavily. He’d actually wanted to make love to Alexandra, decided to after her question. He was committed.

In his mind, he was already married. But it was Alexandra’s mind he worried about. He had wanted to show her how much he loved her, and for a brief instance, he thought that making love was going to be the way to do that.

But then, she had looked at him in fear. Because of what that idiot had done to her. She wouldn’t have thought that his plan was to carry her into the bedroom and make love to her, so she had read fury in his eyes, not passion.

As much as he wanted to be upset about her conjecture, it had saved him from making a terrible mistake. One that may have caused him the love of his life. He was certain that if he’d shattered his oath, somehow she would disappear from his life completely.

Not that he really believed God worked that way, but he may have allowed it to happen. He had asked Him to soften her heart; he didn’t need Alexandra’s heart to harden now when they were so close to forever. He knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Alexandra loved him; she was merely frightened of being hurt.

Cameron propped his head up with his hand and leaned over her. She looked peaceful. Her golden curls fanned out over the pillow like a sea of silk. Her skin glowed in the moonlight casting through the verticals. He loved keeping them open a fraction so that he could see her in the muted light.

Never could he have imagined that someone so beautiful, so kind, could love him. And she thought he was perfect. He was anything but perfect. Every day he felt as if he suffered for his previous sins. Alexandra had been the only good thing in his life since he was seventeen.

He had wanted her from the first time he’d seen her, and he had reached out and taken her. If he were perfect, he would have won her fair and square. Instead, he had allowed her to get pregnant by not concerning himself with protection. In a way, he’d even stalked her by waiting for her every night. And then when she’d had nowhere to go, he’d swooped in and taken over her life. All in the pretense that he was helping her. When in fact, he had wanted her so badly, he was almost happy that she had needed him.

It wasn’t because he wanted to take care of her. He knew that. He did want to take care of her, but he knew it was for selfish reasons. He wanted to prove that he could provide for her mentally and physically, so she would want him and need him.

He needed to back off, though. He needed to let her stand on her own two feet. Not that she could do that easily at the moment, but she needed independence.

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